7 years ago, right around this time, I headed in for my 3rd baby's sex reveal ultrasound.
I'll never forget that moment and the huge smile on my face when they said
"It's a GIRL!"
I was HAPPY! Oh, so happy.
With 2 other little girls at home, I was almost relieved because I knew what I was getting into with girls and I really didn't care either way, as long as my new babe was healthy.
THEN IT BEGAN...
"Oh, I bet you really were hoping for a boy!"
"What? Another girl? How is that even possible?"
"I'm sorry, I'm just a little disappointed. I was really hoping for a grandson."
...SEX DISAPPOINTMENT FROM OTHERS!
While these feelings from others were valid;
them voicing them to me was very hurtful.
How do I respond to someone who is making me feel SHAME and GUILT
over something I had no control over?
I would try pointing out how happy I was and how healthy she was,
but it never stopped.
I didn't have too much time to hear it all because
my beautiful 3rd daughter ended up being born at 31 weeks gestation.
But even while sitting in the NICU, holding my amazing, fragile new daughter
I couldn't shake the feeling that everyone was disappointed in me.
Sometimes disappointment comes from within and sometimes it is from others.
Sometimes people's words cut deep and cause horrible guilt.
I'll never forget that guilt:
For being happy about the SEX, when I felt I had let everyone else down.
Your happiness or disappointment about the SEX of your baby should be determined by
Friends and family:
Please, watch your words: They can cut deep.
#lafayetteindiana #kokomoindiana #doula #daughters #momof5 #birth #disappointment
Jessica Anne Dill